• T W O: clapback chronicles

Ignorance Challenge 

People never cease to amaze. In fact, people's sheer ignorance never ceases to amaze me. You know what, let me really b r e a k this down: Caucasian people NEVER CEASE to amaze me.

Some of them have an insatiable desire to re-appropriate the very things that are not theirs. Some of them even go as far as to partake in a very cultural-based norm, make it a trend, and whitewash the name of that norm to “put a twist” on something that HAS been happening for DECADES. While others are just outright and blatantly disrespectful to cultures beyond their own colorblindness. The ignorance, bigotry, disrespect, YOU NAME IT, is at an all-time high, and it just needs to STOP. And though I cannot be the crusader in leading the army of the receipt collecting and shade administering, I will, when I see fit, choose when I want to utilize my petty wit to guide the blind lost in their blissfully chosen ignorance.

Now, I know you are saying, "well… sis, you can't change folk’s minds... blah blah blah...," but, guess what, I don't give a flying fart in space. If those that REQUIRE a seat choose to not TAKE that seat, it is their prerogative. Who am I, after all, but a peeved black woman with a petty bone to pick? Not to mention, this is the land of "alternative" freedoms. They are “entitled,” or so they choose to carry on their lives as such, to do, be, say what they want. And as we have learned with the transgressions of "white-washed" America's mental space, the arrogance of ignorance doesn't fall too far from the less than smart tree.

As a note, I say "white washed" to encompass more than just Caucasians, but to also include even my brethren and sistren of color who are in the "sunken place.” If there is one thing about ignorance, it is truly colorblind, gender blind, sexual orientation blind, YOU NAME IT. It doesn’t exclude anyone. Everyone, to a degree, is at fault for the limitations they set in their own minds. You can’t see beyond your own window if you always keep it closed. Nonetheless, let’s get back on track.

Per usual, this clapback, as any clapback that’s been handed out to those that just don’t see the WRONG in what they feel is so very right, will address ‘ole girl, Vika Shapel. Portland, Oregon's very own “self-taught” makeup artist. ‘Ole girl Vika decided it was a GRAND idea to dabble in the darker shades of makeup to “deepen” her “pasty” skin – as she, herself proclaimed under a caption on her IG page. That caption, nestled beneath, a picture of her and a peer of hers just as blissfully ignorant, parade faces half covered with make-up clearly for my brown brethren and sistren while the other half of their faces remained uncovered… dawning their normal complexions.

Trying, hard in my soul, to figure out what possessed ole girl to even think this was a good idea only brought me to the realization that my lesser hued peers of the internet and of life, in general, still don’t understand the damaging severity of “blackface.” Blackface wasn’t something done to “honor” the rich and deep hues of our skin – by our I mean us colored folk, in particular, black and brown. Rather it was done mockingly. Usually accessorized by the same overly plumped lips my lesser hued peers NOW seek out injections to achieve, as well as paired with wigs of the coiled curls they LOVE to HATE. Blackface, at its ROOT, is disgustingly offensive. Used to point out the traits in us and with us that made us the “other,” blackface did nothing but give our lesser hued counterparts the power they needed to keep us in a sunken place that drove us to believe that the DARKER we were the LESS our life needed to be valued. It was one of the many forms of mind control used to BREAK us down. Used to make us HATE our very own SKIN.

That said, I have no choice but to read ole girl, Vika. My lesser hued sis, I need you to understand that you are WRONG. No, there is no right in this. No, you cannot say the creative freedoms of make-up leaves the world as your oyster for endless possibilities. No, you cannot outline to me how this wasn’t malicious when the historical precedence embedded in blackface is SO HEAVY with hate. Rather, you’d be an idiot to accept any opportunity to participate in any venture that promotes the act of blackface. No, you cannot TELL ME anything that will redeem your actions. I will NOT even touch on the subject of you calling it the "Chocolate Challenge." I will spare you from that additional read on the poor choice of your words. What you can do, girl, is go to the wash basin. Take out your favorite face cleanser, pour a dollop of that in your hand, lather that up on your face and WASH that tom-foolery off your face. Pat dry, then moisturize your OWN skin, your naturally white skin, with your favorite face lotion, mask, oil, etc. Then proceed to wearing the make-up designed for your complexion. Please do NOT pass the Sephora line and buy up Rihanna’s Fenty collection. Please do NOT use $200.00 on Mented’s nude line. Please do NOT find yourself in MAC’s section for us deeper hued folk and purchase the brownest of brown concealers. While you are at it, just gon’ on and make sure you swerve back into your lane if you even get the SLIGHTEST itch to wear a Kente headwrap with Urban’s Outfitters finest rip-off of Kanye’s overly priced clothing line. U-turn back into your lane when the urge to wear a dashiki with uggs in the middle of the summer flushes over your spirit. If at any moment you find yourself needing a new hair-do to rock, and happen to ask your hairdresser for some boxer braids, slicked down tendrils, or mini buns, just do you and your hairdresser a favor and GET UP and LEAVE. Go home. Save your coins girl. Just put your hair in a ponytail or a messy bun.

Vika, girl, I will say this ONCE: Stay in your make-up lane. Stay in YOUR lane. Do not leave it. There are lanes for a reason. There is also reasons why traffic has to flow in a particular direction. Just because it is TRENDY to go against the grain, doesn’t mean this was a tide you needed to surf up against. Remember, it is okay to work on a craft and master that craft for YOU. Do not fall into the pit of trying to design something that is OUTSIDE of YOU. You are NOT BLACK. You are NOT BROWN. You are NOT COLORED. Do NOT think putting on a face that is NOT YOURS makes it YOURS TO HAVE. That is the very definition of THEFT. Which is also, sadly, the very foundation in which America was founded: taking for themselves what is NOT theirs to have. Choose to BE YOU and BE DIFFERENT and not follow in the ignorant steps of your forefathers and mothers.

Welp, on that petty high note, if you do not want to heed my advice, then do you, sis. I mean, you are FREE, right?

But that’s all I can offer to you at this moment in time. Have yourself a wonderful life. And remember, in the wise words of Dave West, “If you think you’re LIT, I will blow out your candle.”

Be great!

– Signed a peeved black woman who is only sorry that she isn't sorry.

:: Post Rationalizing(s)

"Thou shalt not stress over the opinion of the irrelevant.”
― Anonymous ―


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